Posts Tagged ‘paris’

Tinkerbitch Wants To Be Tinkerbell

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Has Disney gone porn? A random reliable source says Disney suits are considering the Skank Queen to play the role of Peter Pan’s whore sidekick in the live-action version of Tinkerbell. The kind of action that requires a night-vision camera with the wonky’s head bobbing up and down.

“Paris has worked on her acting chops lately and showed some comedy prowess in her YouTube spoof of running for president. Disney suits saw it and think she may be developing some comedic-actress potential.”-NY Post

Maybe Wonky McHohan thought she was auditioning for a porn movie called “Tinkle My Bell”. Jesus, just the sight of her leering overly botoxed-face, lanky choppers and nasty chicken legs in my head fluttering around like a praying mantis in a mini skirt makes me want to kill cute and cuddle baby seals. Slut, please! Your acting “potential” don’t mean crap to the fact that America will always see you as a walking venereal-disease carrying celebutard. And for fuck’s sake! Why do bird-brained producers still keep giving this whore a job? Is her tinker”bell” that great?

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Paris Hilton Is Back And Skankier Than Ever!

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Paris Hilton has yet to outgrow her skanky dress up games as she pops in at the Pussycat Dolls Opening as a deflated sex doll. You can tell that she’s officially single when she’s out parading the streets in sluttier clothes. She came at the opening looking like her usual idiot self trying to pull off a sexy cop costume that she probably grabbed from a cheap porn movie set. She reportedly fancies the royal son of Prince Charles and calls her girlfriend mousy.

“I’d be more than happy to date William – so long as he ditches the mousy girlfriend. I couldn’t believe it when I met him. He was awesome and really hot.” -Press

Looks like she’s upgraded her taste in men from garbage rock stars to British royalty. I’ve heard Prince William held an audition for a joker. She might stand a chance. Check out Paris Hilton in yet another reason for me to throw up in the bathroom.

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