Posts Tagged ‘Jessica’
Jessica Simpson’s Nipples Are Great In Bed
11/02/2010 posted in Babe Of The Day, Celebrities in Skirts, Celebrity Ass Candids, Celebrity Nipples, Celebrity Upskirts, Celebs Id Like To Fuck, Celebs without Underwear, Hot Chicks Perfect Tits, Jessica Simpson, Nipple Slips, cleavage candids by: Mike
The world’s biggest douchebag slash turdbrain also known as John Fucking Mayer took out his cock out of his mouth to be interviewed by Playboy and he has quite a few things to say about Dumbo Simpson’s sexual IQ(probably the only IQ she has). Playboy farts out the juicy info:
Mayer on Jessica Simpson:
“Yeah, that girl is like crack cocaine to me. Sexually it was crazy. That’s all I’ll say. It was like napalm, sexual napalm. Did you ever say, ‘I want to quit my life and just fuckin’ snort you? If you charged me $10,000 to fuck you, I would start selling all my shit just to keep fucking you.” -Playboy
Wow. Just fuckin’ wow. ‘Ya know, if you google John Mayer, you can also see Jon Gosselin and Michael Lohan’s images in the results ‘coz google knows this butt-nugget is in the same category in douche-baggering as the two. As for snorting Dumbo, unless you’re Dennis Rodman, I don’t think her massive ass will get way past your nostrils to fuck with your empty brain.
Jessica Simpson Farts At A Business Meeting
29/01/2010 posted in Babe Of The Day, Celebrity Ass Candids, Celebrity Upskirts, Celebs Id Like To Fuck, Hot Chicks Perfect Tits, Jessica Simpson, cleavage candids by: Mike
Because who else can we trust on up-to-date, on-point, Pulitzer-winning NEWS-WORTHY articles other than US Weekly, not only did they queef out a juicy headline on Dumpo Simpson’s fart, they even filed that shit under EXCLUSIVE category:
“While one of the executives was speaking in a room full of five people, Jessica let out a very loud fart,” says the insider.
“Her mother [Tina Simpson] was there, and it prompted her to turn around and yell, ‘Jessica!’ The tension was extreme. No one knew what to say.” -Us Weekly
Okay the bitches over at Us Weekly need to pull the stick out of the asses and relax the fuck down. Seriously. It’s like inviting a pig to a tea-party and expect it to have the grace of a swan. Although in Dumbo’s defense, how can they be sure it’s her fart and not the sound of her monster ass cheeks rubbing against the leather seat?
Jessica Simpson Fucked Tiger Woods
17/12/2009 posted in Babe Of The Day, Celebrity Scandal, Celebs Id Like To Fuck, Celebs without Underwear, Hollywood Gossip, Hot Chicks Perfect Tits, Jessica Simpson, cleavage candids by: Mike
In the latest of Tiger Wood’s whore roster, the nosy bitches over at Starmagazine is sticking the tip of their peens in the story and guess who they’re throwing in the slut pool? You don’t say…
“Just days before Jessica’s split with Tony Romo, she had a sizzling meeting with the fallen golf star at the AT&T National Pro-Am golf tournament in Bethesda, Md. “Tiger liked what he saw and let her know it,” a source tells Star. Since Jess had been fighting with Tony — who was Tiger’s golf partner at the July tournament — she gave as good as she got. “Jessica said that she felt like Tony wasn’t paying attention to her, so she was like, ‘What the heck!’ ” says the source. “She decided to have fun with Tiger whether it bothered Tony or not.” -Starmagazine
Tiger Woods is one racist motherfucker who prefers vanilla punani over cocoa poontang. But who gives a crap, his pimping ways is mad sick and he’s now officially my new hero.
Jessica Simpson’s Pussy Upskirt
15/12/2009 posted in Babe Of The Day, Celebrities in Skirts, Celebrity Couples, Celebrity Upskirts, Celebs Id Like To Fuck, Hot Chicks Perfect Tits, Jessica Simpson by: Mike
Holy beef jerky! Whatever that thing is, I’m sure it tastes nothing like it. It’s been a while I haven’t posted any crap about Dumbo Simpson but I knew in my black heart that it would only take another classy car exit before I would. Remember the freak from Smashing Pumpkins? Ok, you’re right they all are. The one that looks like a cross breed of Freddy Kruger and Verne Troyer? Well believe it or not, he’s hittin’ that pic above at present. E! reports:
It seems Jessica Simpson is now looking to make beautiful music with Smashing Pumpkins frontman Billy Corgan. What reportedly started off as a mere crush has turned into something a whole lot more.
“She has fallen hard and is smitten,” a source tells E! News of Jessica, adding that both she and 42-year-old Billy consider themselves “officially dating.” -E!
And by ‘officialy dating’, it means rubbing each other’s privates. I totally believe this. Knowing Dumbo Simpson’s level of thinking, she prolly thinks he’s one giant walking dildo.
Jessica Simpson’s Cleavage At Ozlem Suer Fashion Show Paris
08/09/2009 posted in Celebs without Underwear, Hot Chicks Perfect Tits, Jessica Simpson, cleavage candids by: Mike
Who let the dog out?! Seriously, what the fuck’s happening to Dumbo? Now I know exactly what my bulldog would look like if I dress him in ruffles. Not a pretty sight. This cow literally went downhill. I got to admit, since Tomo Homo dumped her fat ass, I was kinda expecting to see her work her way back to the old Jessica Simpson in daisy dukes. Instead, I’m seeing Daisy the Cow. I want to know who’s playing a rough joke on her ‘coz something in the milk ain’t clean.
Here’s Cow Dracula at the Ozlem Suer fashion show in Paris, France.
