Don’t look now, but I think this Shauna whore is exactly what this walking blow-up doll will look look in 5 years.

As much as we are all aware that this skank’s punani is as big as the Grand Canyon, let’s spare ourselves the bullshit of not admitting we won’t skeet skeet skeet our way between those juicy funbags. Now that we’ve gotten that out of our chests, enjoy!

If you haven’t gotten enough of Stephanie Seymour’s slippery tit and it’s flirting ways, here it is spotted once again playing peek-a-boo with the paps at St. Barth’s over the weekend.

Is it just me or does she look like a cross-breed between Helena Christensen and Cindy Crawford? A lot older and a more cellulitey version but equally hot, I ain’t hitting that ass any less.

Sweet bouncing butt nuggets! I always suspected Kim Kardashian’s ass has a mind of it’s own. It also know it’s a better tease than the bitch so here they are doing the bikini thing on a yacht in Florida in these pics.  Now if you may excuse me, I have a keyboard to clean…damn that one’s a shitload momma!

Seen here in these pics is a  frisky walrus that loves to camouflage itself by sneaking among people before slipping itself into a bikini and enjoying a sun tan. This walrus is so gifted that it even managed to camouflage itself to look like Kerry Katona. Amazing creatures, these walruses.

Realizing her punani needs a holiday from hosting too much married cocks, she decided to hit the beach while ditching her top. Click the thumbs below for more Sienna goodness.

I know right? Who the hell is Kelly Landry? Well, apparently she’s a celebrity and perhaps after seeing these close-up shots of her bending over with her sweet, borderline black chick ass in the air in Miami you’d give an anal fuck about her as much as I do now.

If you’ve been forced by your girlfriend back in high school to sit through Bring it On before you can claim your reward and by reward, we all know I meant a blowjob, then you may remember this latina babe in one of those hot cheerleading outfits shaking their money shaker while doing back flips. I took the liberty to google the bitch but since I don’t really bother remembering names, let’s just go ahead and call her Cellulite Sally.

I’m not hating. I’d kill to get between those trunk thighs and pound it like a lumber jack to a Christmas tree. And it ain’t even Christmas day.

Dude: Jeezus Cuh-rist…what is that smell??!

Paris: It’s probably the oysters you had in bed this morning honey.

Dude: *mentally kicking himself in the balls* Note to self, remind me to never let this bitch blindfold me again while getting those ’surprise treats’.

Okay fellas calm down…I know our eyes have all been force-fucked into seeing the world’s famous pussy flasher a.k.a Parasite Hilton expose her coochie bits and tits so freely at some point in our lives but let’s go ahead and pretend we have virgin eyes. Here she is sunbathing topless in Mexico. I’m tellin’ ya, you better be an anal guy if you’re gonna be with this whore. Her ass is cleaner than her punani.

There’s not a lot I like about Britain…and the fact that 90 percent of the population looks like something two fraternal twins would bear if one of them got knocked up by the other isn’t really helping. But when I think about it, most chicks there have bigger racks than bitches here in America. Chicks here are way better looking yeah but  if you ask me which one has the better end of the deal…let’s just say I’m a typical man so my dick has the remote control to my brain. On that note, allow me to raise a teacup with my pinky in the air and say…you did good this time Britain, you did good.

Here’s Gemma Atkinson and her sweetbejeezus of a rack for Nuts.

Because I’m a horny motherfucker who doesn’t give a rat’s ass about the Oscars except when there’s titty slips and pussy uspkirts involved which unfortunately didn’t happen, let me focus on stuff that actually matters. Like Alessandra Amborosio’s doo-doo for example.

I know I’ve said it and I’m gonna say it again, I’m not a fan of chicks who reminds me of the malnourished skinned chickens hung and lined up at our local Chinese butcher shop but this evil bitch is basically asking for a butt fuck and as someone with a peen, we are not accustomed to say no to opportunities that gives said peen a taste of the forbidden hole. So here’s Alessandra bent over in a pink bikini. Because she can.