Archive for the ‘Heidi Montag’ Category
Heidi Montag’s Huge Tits In A Busty Dress
17/02/2010 posted in Babe Of The Day, Celebs Id Like To Fuck, Heidi Montag, cleavage candids by: Mike
In a last-ditch effort to save whatever career she has left, Heidi Montag allowed her body to have steamy erotic sex to a scalpel (a.k.a underwent plastic surgery 10 times in one day). I hadn’t noticed but she dissapeared from the whorelight for a long time but now she’s back and…well…still fugly as shit.
Let this be a lesson to all young aspiring sluts out there. You can have all the cosmetic procedure done on your body and it may or may not make your fugly mug look better but at the end of the day, you’re still a little whore like this one. Her double D’s on the other hand are a distraction from her face so on that note, I’d motorboat. Willingly.
Heidi Montag’s Ass In A Bikini
26/08/2009 posted in Babe Of The Day, Celebrities in Bikini, Celebrity Ass Candids, Celebrity Couples, Celebrity Photoshoots, Celebs Id Like To Fuck, Celebs in Bikini, Desperate Celebrities, Heidi Montag, Hot Chicks Perfect Tits, cleavage candids by: Mike
Here are pics of these two asshats dry-humping each other while every living creature at the beach is dry-heaving. Is it wrong to be be turned on by Horsey Montag’s ass? It does look fuckable after all. But then the image of Spencer Pratt is enough to put me back in my place.
No way in hell am I gonna want to fuck that ass that dickwad sticked his tiny peen in. I might get Douchebag Syndrome. And that shit’s as funny as anal cancer.
Heidi Montag Nude In Playboy
17/08/2009 posted in Babe Of The Day, Celebrity Photoshoots, Celebs without Underwear, Desperate Celebrities, Drama Queen, Heidi Montag, Nude Celebrities by: Mike
In other useless celebrity news, I never thought I’d see the day when Playboy has officially jumped the damn shark by putting Heidi Montag on the cover of this month’s issue. What’s worse is that they took the risk, paid her a decent amount of money all for a half-assed semi-nudity. What the fuck?? Playboy without the full frontal is like beer without alcohol. To make things worse, they chose this vapid cunt when we all know she should be on the cover of an equestrian mag. This is all kinds of fail. I’m smelling old man Heff’s retirement train boarding pretty soon.
Well for what it’s worth, here’s Horsey Montag’s nude pics for Playboy. Damn, what happened to the ‘tits and ass guaranteed or get your money back’ policy?
Heidi Montag And Spencer Pratt’s Honeymoon In Mexico
04/05/2009 posted in Babe Of The Day, Celebrities in Bikini, Celebrity Couples, Celebrity Honeymoon, Celebs Id Like To Fuck, Celebs in Bikini, Desperate Celebrities, Heidi Montag, Hollywood Gossip, Hot Chicks Perfect Tits by: Mike
Twit and Twat was spotted in Mexico for their fake honeymoon in the middle of all this swine flu crisis. I’m not sure why these assclowns still bother to wear masks when they’re the fuckin’ swine flu but anything to shut their shit-loaded mouths is heaven to all of us. Anyway, for the two people who cares, here are pics of these two douchebags at the beach. I don’t know, maybe it’s just me but do I see borderline cankles on Heidi Hoe?
Heidi Montag & Spencer Pratt Elope In Mexico
25/11/2008 posted in Heidi Montag, Hollywood Gossip, Spencer Pratt by: Mike
Due to some serious Hollywood scoop drought, I am now forced to write about Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt’s little eloping stunt last Thursday in Cabos, San Lucas Mexico. These ‘everyday is photo op day’ clowns has for once tried to steer away from the paparazzi as they reportedly went on a secret ceremony at the One & Only Palmilla Resort. Apparently, the Barbie impersonator’s dad wasn’t informed by dear daughter.
“I would be upset if she got married and didn’t invite me!” [And if the report is true?] “Then we just have to have another wedding here!” -People
They exclusively sold their wedding pictures to Us Weekly and worst case scenario is it will be out on news stands as soon as next week. These two camera hoggers need to stop crawling in the spot light and save a lot of trees from being logged just to rot in magazine stands.
Still reading? Thought I lost you at Heidi Montag & Spencer Pratt. Here are their vows taken from their ever reliable pal to free publicity, Perez Hilton.
“Heidi, from the moment you came into my life, I knew my life would never be the same without you. You are the light in my life like the sun to the earth! Your loving warmth makes me want to be a better person. Being with you, I feel complete. I’m honored to even be able to call you my wife. You are the most amazing, loving and caring woman on this planet. I will love you forever and always.” -Pratt
“From the moment I met you, I knew I wanted to marry you. I never knew love existed like this. You have opened my eyes and shown me a new world. Every moment with you is magical and amazing. You are truly my prince charming and dream guy. I love you with all my heart and soul and promise to be the best wife to you every day for the rest of our lives. I can’t wait to see what life brings us. I will always be by your side!” -Montag
While their vows are Hallmark-material, let’s hope they won’t smell the crisp spice of their divorce papers soon.
